Pray Without Ceasing
Seeking, Knocking, Believing... Praying & Praising
Pearls of Prayer (unpublished devotional that I’m currently working on)
Day Two:
Matthew 8:13 “And Jesus said unto the centurion, Go thy way; and as thou hast believed, so be it done unto thee. And his servant was healed in the selfsame hour.”
October brings change. Change for the mountains where I live. They change from green and blue to mahogany, tangerine and cinnamon with precious gold and amber sprinkled in. Then there is the change from warm to cool, the change from dustings of flowery petals to the dustings of pumpkin patches and scarecrows. There is a change in me, too.
When the weather grows colder and my soul begins to feel the inklings of autumn, I reach for more than a sweater. I reach for the priceless joy of knowing He is here, in this place, in each misty breath, in this room where I rest my head, in this heart where faith is as much a part of my life as the next cup of coffee or the next yawning morning. There is a God who reminds me, as the weather changes, my heart and soul change too. I become less busily focused on the time and more focused on the still of a quiet twilight. The dusty roads become my favorite highways. And it’s needless to say that as the magic of autumn rustles through my spirt, the beauty of the forest, the river, the sunset – they all leave me breathlessly reeling and realizing that God, in all His glory, broke through the most hopeless heart with this gentle calm, this charm, this creative touch from His heart that we call Autumn or Fall.
But what you must be wondering about is if my husband came out of his surgery with a good report. Well, that is a story that is still unfolding as I speak (or write). It is a challenging tale and one that sometimes leaves soft tears against my spirit and other times blends with the Autumn leaves to tell a story of hope that only God, in all His glory, could bless our lives with.
Yes, I hope for the best outcome. I am hoping, praying, coping. I am worrying – even when I know the worry is not something God wants for me. My husband is going through so much. Radiation. Chemotherapy. The pills and the heartache. The fears and tears. The side effects and the tiredness, a weariness that seems to leave its shadow on our most precious moments. We’re both tired, yet there is hope. We still have hope, even amid the despair. Even though we don’t always say it, we know God is here and He is blessing us amid the gaping holes of confusion and chaos. He is here, even when we fear. He is here and He’ll never leave us nor forsake us. He is with us, through thick and thin. A constant. The never changing, always amazing, God of the universe. The God of my heart and soul. The only God who has it all under control.
While our lives have changed, our hearts have not. We still depend on the love of a Savior, our Savior, to bring us through the darkness. We still know what it means to love Him, even when we don’t understand the reason cancer has come into our lives. We know that He is making a way. And we trust Him as we continue to pray, even though we can’t comprehend what is at the end of this journey we’ve embarked on. We’re trusting the only One who has the answers and believing that He is there for us, despite this diagnosis that silences dreams but still leaves shreds of hope in our hearts.
It’s mid-October now and we’re seeing the changes from the weather all over our mountains. The hills are glistening with breathtaking blankets of exciting leaves and quaint gestures. Our mountain home is beautiful during this time of year. We’re blessed even through we’re walking through the darkest time we’ve either one known. This is the stuff of nightmares. The stuff of stories that I always hoped I’d never experience. The stuff of journeys that I always meant to avoid.
But this is my story now. This story has taken away the easiness of a simple existence and replaced it with one more story of cancer’s foreboding shadow. I believe my husband can be healed. I pray for him daily and I believe Jesus will heal him. I pray Jesus will heal him. I can’t even begin to imagine my life without him. I love my husband. I love him enough to pray unceasingly. I will keep praying. I will keep praying.
And, believing – God will heal him. Oh, how I pray for this healing. One touch from the Master. If my husband can but touch the hem of His garment.
A Prayer & A Promise:
Dear Lord, I know You can see how much my husband means to me. And, yes, I also know that so many others before me have traveled this path and rested in the assurance that You’re here guiding us through it all. Lord, have mercy. Leave my husband here on earth, with me. I need him so much. He’s my friend and partner, my heart and soul. He is the love of my life and the one who helps me through this world. Jesus, only You know how my heart is breaking, how my mind is quaking, how my faith keeps me from forsaking – You know, Jesus. And, all I can say, all I can pray, is please, Lord, heal my husband. Make a way. Please, Jesus, just make a way. I love You and praise You and know that whatever You say, that is the best, come what may. Amen.
“God does nothing except in response to believing prayer.”
- John Wesley
I Hear You, Jesus Your voice, a gentle wind, dancing Whispering through my heart and spirit Music so alive and rhythmic, enhancing So that I know the joy of a light so awing Your voice, a song who silences the pain Reminding my soul that I have all I need With You beside me, I’ve so much to gain This is a love beyond words, beyond describing Your voice, mysterious as the tears I cry When I can’t feel You, the darkness is deadly Nothing I know means more than You and I As we share this time, this moment of light Your voice, assurance that You are my life Without You, I’d not understand faith’s smile Because I know You, I’ve overcome such strife With You, there is a love that never will die Your voice, music to the heart who knows Love this sure, this beautiful, always decides Between then and now, there is truth that shows What it means to believe, praising always Your voice, kindles a feeling of intense praise Praising the Father and Son, who never betray Praising so that You hear the love that will amaze Love that came down from heaven to bless with grace Your voice, rising from the wind, from the stars Pours out a joy that rises from the love that decides Between You and me, there is hope that is always ours As long as we’re together, in Your presence I’ll abide Your voice, reminds me that I’m loved so deeply With a love that is alive and will never leave me A love that comes from the Son who loves completely With a love that lives beyond this life – into everlasting Your voice, dear Jesus, is the voice of light Reaching beyond the darkness, through the shadows To abide, within me… making everything all right Reassuring me that every tear will be left in the past Your voice is the voice of God’s tenderness I know that, because of You, I am so blessed!
Keep Praying In the still of dawn, When the leaves swim Through the mist Soft as a lover’s whim In the silence of morn’, With autumn’s gentle call Whimsical as the sun Making the world feel small In the serenity of daylight While the birds take flight There is a gesture of faith Rising before autumn’s frostbite In the still of a morning dew Hesitating on thriving petals Warming the heart who knew Autumn’s light soon settles In the silence of dawn’s light Sounds of joy fall over my life Who hears the wind whisper And believes love heals all strife In the serenity who is flowing Stirring awake the heart and soul Reminding believers who’re growing That God is still in control In the still, in the silence, serenity Reminds me that she’s His child And whatever comes to me here on earth His love is alive, glory so wild… Sing to Him, my soul, my breath Heedless of the darkness, the shadows Who try to dissuade my heart A heart who feels His love, so close Never let me go, I keep saying As my heart tells me to keep praying!
Italian Sonnet: Shadow Dancing Wistful shades of light in orange and gold Pouring out heaven’s great plans on still limbs Breathing calm through the hills, like cherubims Brushing souls with cascades of light untold With Autumn’s twilight comes the early cold Verses dance on soft skies like gentle hymns Loitering o’er grey, wistful clouds, grief dims Wrens and robins lift beaks, the air to scold Old souls who love rustling woods, heed God’s voice Listening for the calm of warm solace Who lives in the song, moving through forests O’er mountains, through the valleys, souls rejoice With autumn’s outburst, splendor is flawless Fall, juicy spice of gifted folklorists.
